Living in Impressions. Take care

The way of listening leaves a residue costing peace of mind

I read in a newspaper, so it must be true (!) - that a survey revealed that men mostly have six topics to talk about.

1. Politics

2. Sport

3. Women 

4. Money

5. Work

6. Technology (cars, computers, mobile phones).

Photo taken while walking on clifftops in Cornwall, England. To live in the spell impressions means living in a bubble of self-other delusion

Women have more than 40 subjects to talk about. In terms of impressions, I do apologise on behalf of the male species for the limitations of what we, men, can talk about. 

Such views can generate a lot of impressions about our perceptions of gender and differences.

We can carry around for decades an unexamined life haunting our life.

Mindfulness refers to communication in the past, present and future.

The Way of Listening

You listen to another. You know there is something important in what you hear. The conversation is beneficial, informative, loving, a sharing experience. Or, it could be difficult with misunderstanding between two people or more. Upon reaching the closure of the conversation, it will leave an impression in your mind. The impression is critical in terms of present/future wellbeing.

You walk away with a residue idea of what he, she, other or oneself said or did not say. That impression registers in consciousness, which gets carried to the next meeting. If you hold onto that impression, it will influence your next meeting with the person or persons.

This impression easily builds up a picture, either positive, negative or somewhere in between. It changes from an impression into a fixed view making it the reality of oneself or another. The picture in the impression comes to be seen by oneself as what the conversation was about. The impression may not be true.

For example, you leave a meeting with a positive impression and regard it as a valuable meeting. What was valuable? What was insightful? What was worth applying after the meeting? It is not the positive feeling that is important as the mindfulness, clarity and insight from the meeting that matters. We tend to live too much in the world of impressions.

Negative Impressions

A difficult meeting may leave a negative impression. You hold onto a negative impression will affect the perception of the person or persons when you meet them the next time. You then carry the impression from the past, which acts as a shadow over the immediacy of the new contact. It is a challenge to understand a communication, to see what is positive or negative, and to be mindful, whether one is carrying an expectation that as it was before, so it will be the next time.

There are no grounds for truth trapped in impressions. This perception from impressions is unfair to the other person as she, he or they may change. We fail to realise that because we carry the impression from the past into the present and future. Nobody has the power to remain absolutely consistent.

We change with and without intention,

Human beings dwell as impressionable creatures.

The spell of impressions easily generates a lot of suffering.

Take care.